Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
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