She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
