Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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