if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize