How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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