whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
