whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
