Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
