i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
