I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
