wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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