There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
