My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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