i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
