Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
