I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
from now on my penis is your penis
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize