He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
