I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
