Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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