is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
