Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
