Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
