I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
