yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
