why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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