while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
i dont even know how to be here
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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