This girl is more easily done than said...
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Randomize
