Are we in a gay sports bar?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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