I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
