I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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