Can Purell be used as lube?
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
