question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
