I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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