How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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