Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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