you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
