doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
