:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Randomize
