Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize