"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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