its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Randomize
