i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
