My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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