I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize