I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
