She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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