Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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