I bet he comes in French.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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