I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize