somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
