Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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