Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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