get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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